I'm recommending that you actually take out the reference to the cell-cycle etc and just focus on Mitosis, as narratively it keeps the focus nice and tight. Obviously you're going to have more info on screen, and you'll be visually showing what's happening, which means the poem doesn't need to give all the info away verbally. I've done a polish, and put some additional stuff in where it felt right - let me know what you think.
Mitosis
There’s a whole world inside us – in you and in me In which our cells are dividing. It’s amazing, you’ll see.
It’s a strange word – Mitosis - it means to divide And the what, when and how is what for you I’ll provide.
Mitosis begins as Prophase gets going, As inside the cell some new things start showing.
It’s the nucleus – look! – and like a shell it is home to the coiled human-beings we call chromosomes.
Chromosomes make us - for our genes they’re the store. Twenty-three from each parent and not a single gene more.
It’s pro-metaphase next – as microtubules grow And then to the chromosomes fix and from them form a row.
With a ho and a heave, watch those strings do their bit; Anaphase is the name for when our chromosomes split.
Then telophase sees the cell pinched in the middle - Forming two cells from one isn’t too much of a fiddle!
Cytokinesis sounds scary and it’s a nightmare to spell But it’s amazing quite frankly – hey look! A new cell!
And to think this is happening inside us right now It’s a miracle really - it's like “OMG wow!”
Our cells are our structure - they're all that we are! So thank you, Mitosis, you’re a bit of a star.
6 and 9 are good !👍
ReplyDelete3 and 6 for me...
ReplyDelete6 for me...
ReplyDeleteand also:
I'm recommending that you actually take out the reference to the cell-cycle etc and just focus on Mitosis, as narratively it keeps the focus nice and tight. Obviously you're going to have more info on screen, and you'll be visually showing what's happening, which means the poem doesn't need to give all the info away verbally. I've done a polish, and put some additional stuff in where it felt right - let me know what you think.
Mitosis
There’s a whole world inside us – in you and in me
In which our cells are dividing. It’s amazing, you’ll see.
It’s a strange word – Mitosis - it means to divide
And the what, when and how is what for you I’ll provide.
Mitosis begins as Prophase gets going,
As inside the cell some new things start showing.
It’s the nucleus – look! – and like a shell it is home
to the coiled human-beings we call chromosomes.
Chromosomes make us - for our genes they’re the store.
Twenty-three from each parent and not a single gene more.
It’s pro-metaphase next – as microtubules grow
And then to the chromosomes fix and from them form a row.
With a ho and a heave, watch those strings do their bit;
Anaphase is the name for when our chromosomes split.
Then telophase sees the cell pinched in the middle -
Forming two cells from one isn’t too much of a fiddle!
Cytokinesis sounds scary and it’s a nightmare to spell
But it’s amazing quite frankly – hey look! A new cell!
And to think this is happening inside us right now
It’s a miracle really - it's like “OMG wow!”
Our cells are our structure - they're all that we are!
So thank you, Mitosis, you’re a bit of a star.