Okay Paris - just some tiny bits of housekeeping then...
I think you need a few seconds of blue before your film begins because at the moment, if we were settling down to watch this after pressing play, we would be straight into the action and we'd risk missing something. Ideally, you'd have about 5 seconds of the same blue that forms the background to the first scene, and the music would fade up to during this time, telling us that something is starting, and then the first scene would fade into view; if you had all the time in the world, I'd have it so the 'clouds' faded in first, with the word 'mitosis' appearing as it's spoken - this would make for a smooth, controlled and breezy beginning.
I think the '23 genes from each parent' could/should fade out just before the pro metaphase sign papers - it seems rather inert and maybe outstays its welcome - what do you think?
In terms of additional sound - I just wonder if an actual sound of people going "heave" or we hear a sort of straining sound as if someone is trying to pull something apart - it feels like this moment could take this kind of cartoony sound. Likewise, when the cells finally split, it just feels like there should be a big cartoony cheer, as if to say 'congratulations! You did it!'
I don't like the 'popping/bubbling' sound very much - it's nearly right but it doesn't quite feel full enough to accompany all those cells credibly - I'd do a bit more work here.
I agree about easing the viewers into my animation so I will change that.
I can see what you mean that the text outstays its welcome and I have thought about making it fade, but I wanted the screen to look like a Dr Seuss page when it turned like in the image below, but I'll make that change because it does out stay its welcome.
The bubble popping sound is my favourite sound out of the whole thing so I really don't want to change that, I'll see if messing with it in audition improves it at all.
I think 'the cheer' needs to be a proper warm-hearted cheer - not the sort of sound people make when people drop a pint glass in a pub! ;) It's not that the bubble sound is 'wrong' - it just doesn't build to fully match the great number of cells - so it just needs 'more' and a greater sense of layers and depth. I can't believe you're rationalising how a cell might feel... you've obviously been doing this course too long :D
In summary, I just think there's still more work to be done in terms of SFX and the mix - try some stuff, see how it settles.
Okay Paris - just some tiny bits of housekeeping then...
ReplyDeleteI think you need a few seconds of blue before your film begins because at the moment, if we were settling down to watch this after pressing play, we would be straight into the action and we'd risk missing something. Ideally, you'd have about 5 seconds of the same blue that forms the background to the first scene, and the music would fade up to during this time, telling us that something is starting, and then the first scene would fade into view; if you had all the time in the world, I'd have it so the 'clouds' faded in first, with the word 'mitosis' appearing as it's spoken - this would make for a smooth, controlled and breezy beginning.
I think the '23 genes from each parent' could/should fade out just before the pro metaphase sign papers - it seems rather inert and maybe outstays its welcome - what do you think?
In terms of additional sound - I just wonder if an actual sound of people going "heave" or we hear a sort of straining sound as if someone is trying to pull something apart - it feels like this moment could take this kind of cartoony sound. Likewise, when the cells finally split, it just feels like there should be a big cartoony cheer, as if to say 'congratulations! You did it!'
I don't like the 'popping/bubbling' sound very much - it's nearly right but it doesn't quite feel full enough to accompany all those cells credibly - I'd do a bit more work here.
Hey Phil,
DeleteI agree about easing the viewers into my animation so I will change that.
I can see what you mean that the text outstays its welcome and I have thought about making it fade, but I wanted the screen to look like a Dr Seuss page when it turned like in the image below, but I'll make that change because it does out stay its welcome.
http://d1by67ljd45m4v.cloudfront.net/media/EC0C379E-BC03-A30D-863BEC01ED1AC675.jpg
I'll have a look into heave SFX and try it out. A cheer SFX would sound cliché to me and a bit sarcastic in a way, I don't think a cell needs congratulating for something it does 24:7 kinda like you don't congratulate a human body for breathing or a heart beating 24:7 ???
But it is a cartoony world so maybe it's well suited... I'll work on it...
The bubble popping sound is my favourite sound out of the whole thing so I really don't want to change that, I'll see if messing with it in audition improves it at all.
I think 'the cheer' needs to be a proper warm-hearted cheer - not the sort of sound people make when people drop a pint glass in a pub! ;) It's not that the bubble sound is 'wrong' - it just doesn't build to fully match the great number of cells - so it just needs 'more' and a greater sense of layers and depth. I can't believe you're rationalising how a cell might feel... you've obviously been doing this course too long :D
ReplyDeleteIn summary, I just think there's still more work to be done in terms of SFX and the mix - try some stuff, see how it settles.
I shall do my best! :D
Delete